We constantly talk about creating gender equality and a unification of the sexes, yet what happens to the many men we witness who have been broken by their own pasts?
We expound on the concept of root causes and delving deeper into a problem, yet we often do not want to identify, sympathise or foster empathy with the men who seem to behind the abuse, violence and rage.
Through my work in the community of Reiger Park, I have witnessed many men who are utterly broken in heart and soul.
Men have historically been brought up with the notion of having to display a great deal of emotional strength and needing to sustain the household by making concrete decisions for the entire family.
They have to accept the role of head of the structural body by providing financially and spiritually for the dynasty and imparting protection of all sorts continuously. Therefore, one can see these responsibilities are embedded within their genes and blood.
But what happens when these responsibilities are not taught to men as children due to an absent, hurt or abused father figure?
Many times, the father who is absent probably went through the same process of not obtaining, or retaining, a father-and-son relationship.
The challenges faced by men are materialising worldwide because they share a similar problem of growing up without a proper foundation based on sound morals and values.
This results in men who cannot identify with their true self, in the same way as women struggle with this construct.
Yet, we remain more focused on empowering women, teaching them to reconstruct their identities and to strive for levels of equality with the opposite sex.
While this is good, men are, sadly, falling behind and being left out of the conversation.
There are, perhaps, organisations that cater for men and the struggles they face; however, within Reiger Park, men are facing deep levels of emotional turmoil and lack of identification.
Men in the community display a wounded heart, which in turn finds them searching for anything to heal the wound, be it substances, neglect, violence or abuse of power.
When and where have we forgotten the importance of values such as honesty, intelligence, ambition and spirituality?
When are we going to allow men to exhibit and release their emotions in a healthy manner?
Why are we, as women, not engrossing ourselves in the positive aspects of healing for men, by actively and deeply hearing and listening to that which the man speaks?
Do we as a society give men the chance to actually voice their thoughts, with the assistance of an older generation of men to correct the negative thought patterns?
Where are these older, wiser and more knowledgeable men who are meant to serve as active role models within communities, bequeathing and bestowing real values to the young men?
So many men within the community of Reiger Park as well as other communities cannot look at themselves from a true perspective, accepting who they are and where they come from, because their own fathers failed to instil this knowledge in them.
Men have lost hope in religion and God himself as they try to reshape their destinies while feeling as though they’ve overstayed their welcome.
Many of the men in the world at large are going through a tough set of emotions and do not realise or comprehend how to deal with their fear, yet they are expressing a strong desire to be rid of this fear.
I have found hidden within the community some beautiful and precious diamonds, minds that are beyond the average understanding.
Yet we are not permitting these diamonds to shine.
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